Hello, My name is Megan (middle name Monique). I was born on a Full Moon at 11:38 pm on September 18th, 1986 in Dallas, Texas. Though I've traveled to various places in the United States, (and once to Mexico on a cruise) Texas has always been my home. I love the big sky. The variety in terrain. The people. There is comfort for me here. I enjoy and delight in plenty of other places and spaces, but I believe this is always where I will land in one way or another.
My sun sign is Virgo, rising is Gemini, my north node, and moon sign are both Aries - though you probably didn't guess that based on my perceived peaceful nature. My beast mode mostly comes out with our 5-year-old son, Sawyer. But I'll get into that a bit later.
What I love about being me first and foremost is my desire to create a loving, comfortable, safe space for people to be in. Whether it's our home or our workspace, nothing makes me happier than when someone walks in and says "Oh my goodness, it feels and smells so nice in here. I want to stay forever." This pleases me.
For as long as I can remember, I've had a love for writing. Though my practice comes and goes, I always find myself in front of a keyboard longing for that full, voluptuous page of quality, handcrafted content that accurately details my experience at the moment, there for another to enjoy.
My struggle with this (and my many other interests) is that my constant-changing Gemini mind and fickle Aries nature leaves me wandering from thing to thing and finding it difficult to stay put. I find it somewhat easier the older I get. But I often crave the focus and determination of those Capricorn rising signs. Oh, to have a vision so clear and willingness to do the work and keep at it through to completion.
Lately, I've been wanting to be the best I can at managing and building our home life. I want to refine our routine and process to make it the most enjoyable. Finances, landscaping, animal care, clearing clutter, organizing bill pay, groceries, cleaning, organizing, building - there's so much that is calling to me. I want to be the master at living a bad ass life on my own terms. There are lots of places inside of this desire where I face resistance. But still it calls to me, and at the moment I am answering to the best of my abilities. (Though, God - I am willing for all of this to become easier. Show me the way. Amen.)
The Mister and I have been together for 10 years as of August 3, 2018, and married for 7 years on June 11, 2018. We met in our favorite Ennis, Texas Dive Bar, The Wooden Nickel when I was the beer tub girl and had just moved back to town after living in Austin, Texas for 2.5 years. For the first two weeks, we were in communication, I thought his name was Brawn (rather than Brian) because that's what it sounded like he said with his thick country accent amidst the loud music in a smoke-filled bar that one serendipitous evening.
What I love about Brawn is his consistency, integrity, and how much he loves doing excellent quality work, no matter the project. I've learned so much from him during our time together. He has helped me slow down and learn to be more grounded. He's given me the freedom and space to understand myself better inside of our relationship without judgment. He lets me make my own mistakes and forgives with ease. He gives amazing hugs and then there is the cuddling... oohhh the cuddling.
I could do without the constant threat of tickling. No innuendo here. Literally. Tickle threats to which he refers to as "tickle time". #Thisismylife
He holds me when I need to be held and stands his ground when we don't agree on something which gives me time to gather myself and find our compromise. He truly makes life easy. We're pretty drama-free over here, with the exception of my infrequent bursts of crying, and I like it that way.
Hands-down the most difficult part of our relationship is finding ways to stay connected and in communication while our crazy-pants 5-year-old is running around insisting he is the loudest voice in the room at all times. I love the boy, but he's wild.
Being a mom is probably my least favorite thing to talk about because I feel like I'm awful at it. (Please don't send me any pity, pat on the back emails - it annoys me.) Even now, my shoulders just got more tense. I don't know if it is that Sawyer is just a typical 5-year-old boy pushing his boundaries to see what he can get away with, or if his intense personality and mine just aggravate the shit out of each other - but at the moment, we are just not meshing. Can you tell?
I feel like we go through waves of this. No matter what I say or ask him to do, I'm met with opposition and fit throwing. He laughs when I discipline him and takes responsibility for nothing. Sound familiar? Am I describing all children? I can't tell.
Don't get me wrong. There are moments and sometimes even weeks of him being delightful and loving but most of the time he is a firey ball of energy I can't keep up with. I can't help but fear what he might be like as a teenager. Will I have any influence over him? Will he barrel through me then too? Will there always be aggression between us? Is this our fate? Am I just being whiny? This is some real shit, y'all. I'll be sure to come back and update this page when we are having a better week. ::smiles::
Sawyer's personality traits I admire: strong willed, determined, joyful, playful and silly, wild. His memory and ability to recall information (when he wants to) is impressive. His rhythm. I think he's going to do something musically as he ages. Drums for sure. Maybe guitar or more.
I remember my Dad saying to me when I was a teenager, "You have a lot of friends. That's good." For years I've worn that as a badge of honor. I understand why he respects that, coming by friends hasn't been as effortless for him. My Virgo/Gemini assist me with that.
Over time I've welcomed almost anyone into my life. Some people stay, some go. Some I enjoy the presence of more than others. As 2018 approached I realize how thin my energy felt. How many people I extended my personal life to. The various kinds of energies I opened myself up to. But mostly, this impulsive, somewhat uncontrollable desire to want to become friends with every person I met. There's nothing wrong with that, except that it became depleting for me.
So when January rolled around I decided I was going to close off my inner circle for the year and not willingly invite anyone new in, unless God saw fit.
Here I am in April feeling more introverted. More loved. More clear on the kind of relationships I want to involve myself with. I have a lot of important people in my life and I'm trying to honor all of them to the best of my ability. I'm grateful I have so many wonderful souls around me. I'm a lucky lady.
Small Business Owner
If I'm going to be honest, I have a love/turmoil relationship with our small business (or myself, sometimes I don't know the difference). I co-own Your Spirit Sparkle with my BFF Heather Cherie. Heather is an incredible Licensed Massage Therapist and I.. do whatever the hell I feel like that month. Just kidding - kind of.
We have events at the space for women, Sacred Sunday (a women's circle with oracle cards, if you will), Planner Workshops, sometimes yoga classes. Recently we had Marley's (Heather's daughter) second birthday party there! It is also a sometimes retail shop where we carry stones, crystals, jewelry, oracle cards, books, incense, and whatever else catches my fancy at the time.
My Gemini-mind, the part of me that constantly wants something else is the aspect of myself I struggle with the most. It shows up clearly and most frequently in my work.
I go through periods where I am clear, motivated, focused, driven, inspired. And then that all comes to a dead halt and I have ALL the ideas and none of the motivation to take action, mixed with confusion and self-berating. It can get messy in this head of mine and Heather can always feel when I am pulling away.
I wonder how long I will be doing this kind of work and if it is really meant for me. I wonder how much of me being here is by my own doing, rather than God's. I think about whether anything other than writing and having truth-filled conversations is just a distraction for me. I've been told I make things more complicated for myself. That is unintentionally true.
One thing I know for sure is that we have 3 and a half more years on our lease which gives me time to sort things out. Hands down, no doubt - I absolutely love, coaching. Even if it's not with my clients, my favorites are the deep moments I have with women sharing their story. That, without a doubt, is the heart of my mission here. And really, that could look like anything. God - guide me. Show me the way.
Some of my interests include, but are not limited to:
Playing guitar - I am currently practicing: Mama he's Crazy by the Judds, Angel from Montgomery by Bonnie Raitt, Riptide by Vance Joy, Silver Lining by First Aid Kit, Jolene by Dolly Parton, Delta Dawn by Hellen Reddy.
Spending time in my journal and/or planner - I process my experiences through writing. When I journal, it helps me get clear on where I stand in certain situations. It also lets me voice my experience without the opinion of someone else. It's a grounding practice for me. I love using my planner as a note-taking journal as well. It also brings me pleasure to have documentation of how I felt and how I have been spending my time. I also use my planner to draw, doodle, and color.
Watching the weather - we have a storm cellar in our backyard, so there is definitely an eliminate of weather watching that is for our safety, but I love the rain. I love the sunshine. I love the clouds and the sunrises and sunsets. I share photos of them on instagram. Weather watching is my therapy. It's even more enjoyable when I have delightful friends or family over to partake as well.
Oracle cards - I use these in my coaching sessions, but I also use them in my daily life. Oracle cards help me to see clearly where God is directing me and what bull crap I need to let go of.
My hair - I go through periods of time when I keep my hair pretty basic. But I find it satisfying to wear my hair differently. Right now since it's bleached so light I get to play around with temporary pastel colors (mostly purple) and I'm having fun with that.
Cleaning/Rearranging - If you come into the Your Spirit Sparkle space, just about every time you enter it will be arranged differently. I don't have as much fluidity in my home when it comes to versatile space, but I rearrange furniture and items constantly in my home. It's a creative art for me. I like it when things look and feel new and fresh. The energy changes, and so does my experience.
So there you have it - that's all I care to share about myself at the moment. ::smiles:: How are you feeling? Are you wanting to get to know me more? Do you think you would benefit from having my presence in your life? Have you considered having a coach?